Friday, December 27, 2013

Families Are Forever...Or At Least They SHOULD Be

I had a post shared on my facebook page yesterday by a good friend and it turned into World War III. It had nothing to do with my own was just shared for this persons close friends and family to see. 
And in this blog today...I am referring to the post that was shared on my facebook page yesterday and comparing it to all the other dysfunctional families in the world today....and I'm not speaking about ANYONE in my own family.  But I 'am part' of a very dysfunctional family on two very separate sides of the family.  SURPRISE!!!  And you all thought I had a 'real' storybook life in La La Land.  Nooooooooooo...I CHOOSE to live a 'make believe' storybook life in La La Land.   SO...I can go around moping about what my life isn't...or I can keep looking for the silver lining in those storm clouds.  "I" keep looking for that silver lining.   It just comes back to what I say ALL THE TIME...You can't change other people.  You can only change yourself. 

What I think is so SO sad about dysfunctional families that just can't get that so much time is wasted and lost... on trivial things.  Be it jealousy, selfishness, pure meanness or this or that.  AND THERE IS GOING TO COME A TIME...when those people will never have a chance to turn those situations around ever again. 

I saw the pictures below scroll through my facebook feed the other day and I copied and pasted them into a draft...Not having any earthly idea what I was going to do with them...But I knew there was a story of some those pictures.
This morning, when I sat down to the computer and put on my thinking cap to decide what I was going to talk to you about...I was scrolling and looking and reading as I was thinking and came upon that post from yesterday on my facebook page...and THEN...I remembered these pictures.  GOD had a plan for these pictures a week ago....I just didn't know his plan...until this morning.

But let me tell you something folks.  You can fight your little battles till Kingdom comes...but what are you going to have in the end?  You're going to have the aftermath of a riff...that really probably didn't mean a hill of bean decades ago...that broke hearts and left victims laying by the wayside all along your road of life....and for what? 

Tempers need to calm down.  Parents of grown kids need to let their kids be adults when that time comes.....Kids that have grown into adulthood need to BE adults when that time comes.  When your kids have homes of their own you are no longer the head of THEIR house...Families branch out and each one establishes their own home and someone in each of those homes takes on the responsibility of being the head of each home....
The parents of those kids can like the way the grown kids do...or they can lump the way they do...but once they are adults in their own home...unless there is violence involved...the parents really have no say so in the way they live their lives.  Now I'm not talking about simple/helpful suggestions now and then...I'm talking about trying to totally control grown kids lives in their own homes.

GROWN KIDS with their own homes need to realize that mom and dad may have had a pretty rough time in raising them.  Money may have been pretty tight....long hours of work and tons of overtime and a heavy work load at home to boot...Maybe it was a big family...with each needing many things to keep them going and up with their schooling and their friends.  Maybe life was pretty hard for mom and dad and maybe there was tons of stress along the way.  Maybe all of that work and all of the stress combined...caused tempers to flare way too often.  Maybe mom and dad are from the 'old school' and have strict rules and standards for their kids.  "I" grew up with those rules and standards in the 1940's and 50's and 60's and it didn't hurt 'me'....In fact...strict rules and standards during childhood usually make a person a better and stronger person by the time they reach adulthood.

 It's hard to know sometimes...what to do in certain situations...but there is one thing that we must always remember in making our decisions...both large and small through out life...And that is that there are many wolves in sheeps clothing...and the scary thing about that IS...that they can usually keep that very well hidden from those that need to know it the most.
And no matter how you twist or turn a situation....there is absolutely NO right way to do a wrong thing....NONE!!!

We don't have to always agree with our grown fact, few parents DO...And grown kids don't always have to agree with their parents that are usually set in their own ways...and few grown kids DO.  But what God DOES EXPECT of ALL of respect on both sides.  He expects you to continue to love and cherish those family members for as long as he decides to give any of you some time on this earth.  And when we don't DO that...REGARDLESS of our reasons...God is not happy...And who in the dickens is stupid want to upset GOD???

Below is the post I found on facebook last week....Scroll slowly through the pictures and take a peek.....        

An Elderly Couple Took The Same Photo Every Season.
The saying “a picture is worth a thousand words” for a reason. Explaining how we feel is one way of getting a message across. Another is simply showing each other how we feel. During each season, this couple took a photo together in front of their house. In the resulting series of images below, without saying anything at all, a love story is being told. It’s full of hope, joy, fear and loss, but it’s told in the most unique way. You’ll see what we mean – and then you’ll be moved by it.

Now this could be a couple through the years...or it could be a family as it grows and goes in many directions as it grows through the years.  But you're going to have the same ending at some point...whether it's a couple or a family.   One half of that couple isn't going to be here...and it could happen slowly over time to help the other one prepare...if preparation for that kind of thing is ever really even possible...or it could happen in a moment in the twinkling of an eye.

Same goes for a family...One day down the line...and for some it could be sooner, rather than by one...each one of those family members are going to come to the end of their own days.

The main thing to remember...if you're a person with a heart made of stone is THAT...SOMEDAY...your opportunity to turn that dysfunctional family situation not going to be an option any longer.  Because that person in your family that you grew up with and loved with all your heart and shared all of that laughter and tears with over the going to come to the end of their days...AND there are usually more than one person involved in these dysfunctional family situations.  So many hearts are broken when someone in that family DOES pass on and there is now...NO right the wrong that has caused the riff...all of those precious/priceless years.

Peace and love from the canyon...I love you all gobs and gobs and thanks so SO much...for stopping by...